Thursday, June 18, 2015

Would Conchita Wurst Sound As Sweet By Any Other Name?

A conch is the shell of a mollusc or shell fish. The Bivalvia, known in previous centuries as the Lamellibranchiata and Pelecypoda," comprise, so Wikipedia informs,  "a class of marine and freshwater molluscs that have laterally compressed bodies enclosed by a shell consisting of two hinged parts. They have no head."

Well never mind about the head or lack thereof, just think about the shell, the two hinged parts spread wide and viewed from the outside. What do you see? Well, to some, what they see is reminiscent of the vulva, the external female genital organs of a mammal, in particular the labia majora located on either side of the vagina. No surprise, therefore, to learn from the Urban Dictionary that in Spanish, "conch" is slang for "cunt" and "conchita" means "little cunt."

Which naturally draws attention to the last name of the European song contest winner of our title, namely, "Wurst." As most readers will know, a wurst is a German or Austrian sausage, so few will be surprised to learn from the Urban Dictionary that "wurst" is also a slang term for penis. Hence my question: would the judges of the European song contest have been so enthused by the performance of the man with tits, or is a it a woman with a beard and penis, had he/she been introduced not as the pleasant sounding — to the English speaker's ear — Conchita Wurst, but as the rather less charming, Little Cunt Penis, or some variant of the same? Just asking.

No comments:

Post a Comment